5 Tips for continuous improvement through failure
So things didn’t go as planned and you are disappointed with the outcome. What do you do now? It is in the moment of when everything hurts and your emotions are running high. In the book ‘Sometimes you win, Sometimes you learn’(link here) it talks about changing your perspective and learning from failures.
Lessons are not learnt through failure, they are learnt through reflection
We are all going to fail at something. So you didn’t get that promotion you thought you were going to get. What are you going to do next? Telling everyone that will listen how unfair things are is not going to change the outcome of the decision. Nor is it going to help you get the promotion in the next round. It might be an initiative that you are driving that fails. No one thought it is worth funding or the results were below expectations. If you focus on growth then you are probably failing more often than you are not. But that is not a bad thing. Learning from failure does not happen automatically though. You are emotionally exhausted afterwards all the effort and wanting it to succeed. At this point, the natural reaction is a disappointment or worse. After all, you didn’t set out to fail.
In the book, it talks about 11 attributes to a changing your mindset and learning through the failure. I want to focus on five points which resonate more strongly for me.
One. Cultivate humility — The spirit of learning. I wrote about ego (link here) a few months ago and how subtle the influence your ego can be on your behaviour. When your ego has kicked in you are focused on blaming external factors. You want yourself and others to know it wasn’t your fault. Humility is when you are accepting that you have your flaws and you make mistakes. It is accepting that you can be better the next time and stumbling are ok. It is accepting that things could have played out differently if your actions were different. Humility gives you a broader perspective of yourself and the situation. Ego keeps your mind narrow and focused on blame and that includes a quiet shameful naive on yourself. Being humble also ensures you let go of the need to be perfect. That perfection mindset is great when it drives you to do great things but it can also be blinding on what matters sometimes.
Two. Accept responsibility. The first step of learning. All too often this is the starting point of so many people. The victim mentality can sound like this. ‘There was not enough time’ or ‘If they just did their job properly’. By not accepting responsibility you are giving control away. Your reasons might be valid but it is not going to help you the next time you are in this situation. You want to reframe your mindset to think about what you could have changed to change the outcome. Seeing things with the lens of ‘if I changed this’ to ensure the outcome is different the next time it happens. If you focus on blaming the external factors than when it occurs again the results will likely be the same. This might even mean re-evaluating the rules/conditions that you perceive are there.
Three. Improvement. The focus of learning. Improving yourself is the first step to improving any outcome that relates to you. We like being comfortable, the feeling of mastery. To learn something new and master it requires you to go through discomfort that is why it is so easy to avoid. This is why change management practices exist. People like familiar and feeling like they are good at something. How can we grow if we are not committing to being uncomfortable and learning something new? What if you pushed through the emotional discomfort of failure and asked one question like ‘what would you have done?’. It would be a vulnerable moment that would challenge your ego. You could see the situation from a different perspective and continue moving forward in a direction you didn’t consider.
Four. Bad experiences. The perspective of learning. How long we think when we lose determines how long it will be until we win. One of the most common things I hear is ‘i tried that, it didn’t work so I won’t be trying that again’. If this is you it means that you focusing on the losses and building regret. The next time you have a bad experience you need to first accept that we are all human and we will all fail sometimes no matter how hard we try. Keep the right perspective and see the situation as an experience that is not a representation of your self-worth. It is a process of learning and part of your growth. Lastly, don’t give up, no one wins them all. Take your new learnings and devise a new plan and get started with the smallest step possible.
Mistakes are painful when they happen, but years later a collection of mistakes is what is called experience.
Five. Change. The price of learning. To grow you must be willing to let your future be unlike your past. Your past doesn’t dictate your future unless you repeat the same steps over and over. To grow you want to make sure that you are willing to change. Stop blaming your environment and think about what you can change. Change your attitude, having the right attitude will change the outcome of learning from failure or dwelling on it. Limit your time with people that are not willing to change and want to go round and round complaining about everything. Finally, let go of what you know and be open to learning something different. To quote Bruce Lee
Empty your cup so that it may be filled
Remember in every situation you have a choice. You dictate what you do next and what you can gain or lose from that situation. Be positive and focus on learning and growing and before you know it you will be in a happier and more experienced place.
